by Dr Boyce Watkins
I do not pretend to be a dating guru, but I am a man who has seen some things. In my 47 years of life, I’ve seen people waste their time with sub-optimal choices, finding themselves wondering why they missed obvious signs that could have saved them years of despair and regret.
Since writing my book, “Financial Lovemaking,” I’ve been fascinated with the way money runs our lives and shapes our choices. I’ve also become convinced that my doctoral training in Finance isn’t just so I can recite financial analytics from Bloomberg reports, but to help people make better decisions that will lead to them to the happiness they deserve.
In this spirit, I’ve put together a list of 5 things a woman may want to look for in order to determine if a man is going to be financially successful. This is not an exhaustive or definitive list. It is a blueprint that might help you identify clear warning signs later on down the road.
- Does he have any goals and are they clear? A man without goals is a man who could be aiming to fail. Most people I’ve known to build tremendous amounts of wealth had a long-term plan and the plan was very specific. If his plans aren’t clear or don’t exist, this could be a problem. You can’t drive to your destination if you’re sitting still or blindfolded.
- What does he say when he talks to you? Most people will tell us who they are if we simply shut our mouths and listen. We also need to believe them when they talk. When money comes up in the conversation, how does he talk about it? A person who talks about where they plan to invest will typically be wealthier than the person who only talks about what they are going to buy. Listen to his words when he talks about money, that will tell you everything about his economic mindset.
- What do his actions tell you? One of the most consistent signs of manhood is the ability to align your actions with your words. If you see him spending money like a lunatic and constantly pulling out his credit card to impress you, remember that this could be a man leading himself to financial disaster.
- Does he have education/training or have a desire to obtain it? Those who have skills have an easier time paying the bills. If he doesn’t value knowledge, skill, training and education, he might be a bad pick if you’re looking for someone who will become financially free.
- What does he own vs pretend to own? It’s not that difficult to drive a nice car in America or have nice clothes. The problem is that a) many of these assets depreciate in value and b) they can also be bought on credit. Men who are on their way to becoming wealthy tend to own one of these three things: Stocks/bonds, real estate or a small business. If he has no interest in any of these three investments and has made no moves in that direction, this could be a dead giveaway that you’re locking yourself into a bad economic situation.
These rules are not hard and fast. Nor am I saying that a man who doesn’t understand wealth is sure to be a loser. The list is based on what I’ve observed over the years as indicators of wealth, and tools you can use to help you make the right decision. People love to lie to you and tell you that money doesn’t matter in love, but the fact is that money is one of the leading causes of stress and divorce. It has caused suicides, homicides, and horrific devastation. On the other hand, making the right decisions can create a level of happiness that would have been very difficult for you to achieve on your own.
Your future is important, choose wisely.